Cleaned, corrected and missing dashes added by Tronar
Oh, Danny boy
The pipes, the pipes are calling
From glen to glen
And down the mountainside
The summer's gone
And all the roses falling
'T is you, 'tis you must go
And I must bide
Thank you.
Which one's ours?
The one who looks like she blows her nose with hundred-dollar bills.
- They all look like that. - Joke. That's her over there. Let's go.
We shouldn't have to be asking for charity.
Department needs the money. Smile.
Mrs. Doverton?
Hi, I'm Teresa Lisbon. This is Kimball Cho.
We're with the CBI. You're sponsoring us for the event, I believe.
Oh, yes, of course. Yes, well, welcome.
I was very sorry to hear about your terrible loss.
- You know, those agents? - Thank you.
I can only imagine what you must all be feeling.
We don't talk about it.
Thanks.
I'd like to introduce you to my nephews.
- This is Thomas. - Hi.
Say hello, Thomas.
Hi, hi. Please, call me Tom.
Ha, ha. And this is George.
So, Miss Lisbon, what entertainment do you have planned for us this evening?
A member of our team used to be in show business.
He's sort of a magician, and he's going to entertain us, hopefully. Yeah.
How nice.
Cheers.
- What? - Just a smile.
He just smiled.
Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Mr. Patrick Jane...
of the California Bureau of Investigation.
Good evening.
Good-looking crowd. Thank you for coming this evening.
You too, back there. Look very regal up there in the window.
My name is Patrick Jane. I'm from the CBI. This is an egg.
Yes, I'm supposed to do magic tricks and read minds for you...
but after some thought, I decided, what the hell...
I don't really wanna do that corny old stuff, so...
Instead, what I'd like to do is much cooler.
I would like to transform your consciousness.
Have any of you ever stopped to consider what lucky bastards you all are?
Do you think about the suffering and the injustice in the world?
Every second of every day, there is someone somewhere...
crying out in pain and fear.
A woman is raped. A child starves to death.
A man is executed for a crime he didn't commit.
But here we are.
We could be standing on a roof in some Bangladeshi village...
waiting for the floodwaters to recede.
No!
But, no. Here we are, in this lavish ballroom...
sipping French champagne...
and declining the hors d'oeuvres, thank you very much.
Yes. Put your hands in the air, anyone that feels lucky.
If you think you are lucky, put your hands up.
That's right. We here are all blessed by fortune.
If you disagree, put down your hands.
If you don't think you need to express your thanks for that blessing...
put down your hand.
If you're not willing to write a check that will save actual lives...
then, please, put down your hand.
That's great.
Very good.
Okay. Now, magic. You, sir...
put your left hand in your jacket pocket...
and take out whatever is in there and show it to everybody.
Thank you. Thank you.
Cheers. Thank you very much. Thank you.
Make those checks legible.
A novel way of raising money, I must say.
Well, the direct approach is sometimes best.
Oh, do excuse me.
You son of a bitch, you scared the crap out of me.
Oh, please. Like I don't know how to work a fat crowd of suckers.
Why, yes.
What? No!
- What is it? What's the matter? - Carl's been shot.
Whoever it was, they were thorough.
Bypassed the alarm system somehow, shut off the security cameras.
Prints aren't likely. When was the last time you changed the lock code?
That was a class 5-B vault door. I was told that no one could get through it.
Insurance had better pay.
A good safecracker can get through anything with the right tools.
- This is beautiful. Look at that. - Excuse me.
- Would you stop that, please? - Sure, no problem.
Just having a look. Got some cool stuff in here.
Very cool.
- You two are brothers, right? - Indeed.
Nice to see the case is in such perceptive hands.
Can hands be perceptive? I don't think so.
So is it usual that your uncle is here after closing?
He's not our uncle, exactly.
Oh, I'm sorry. The man having sex with your aunt, then.
No.
But tonight was the benefit. Carl must've forgotten something...
and come back and surprised the thieves.
Mm. Sure did.
What's the deal with Carl and your aunt?
How did they get together?
They met four years ago at the club.
The Labor Day senior tennis tournament.
He was a pro back East.
And they married and he joined the family business?
Yes, that's correct.
Does your resentment of him create any tension?
What resentment?
The old girl gets laid. Next thing you knew, you got a new business partner.
- Come on. You resent him. - No.
Carl's been a godsend, actually. A natural salesman.
- And he's made Esther very happy. - Yes, that's the main thing.
If I may say so, what I do very much resent is the tone of your questioning.
- Sorry if we've offended you. - No, don't say that.
This is a murder investigation. I can be as hard-assed as I'd like to be.
Actually, it's not a murder investigation yet.
If Mr. Ward dies, which seems likely, it'll become a murder investigation.
Oh. Yeah, well, that's right. He's not dead. Uh...
Well, I apologize for my rudeness.
- Let's go. - Okay.
We got a break in the case, boss.
This is last night's footage from a parking-lot camera across the street.
That's Doverton & Co. back there on the right.
Okay, so now we zoom in like this...
- ... and there. That's him. - Uh-huh.
I checked the new intersection cameras the city put in to catch traffic violations.
I figured I'd look at the ones nearest to Dovertons, around that time of night.
Car's registered to Doyle Murphy. His sheet's a mile long...
and safecracking was his specialty.
I got a current address in Locke.
Nice work, Van Pelt. Quick.
It's your hook. Contact local PD and have them pick him up. Take Rigsby with you.
- Thanks, boss. - It's all very neat and easy.
Hey, sometimes it happens that way.
Yeah, I'll take a lay-up anytime, thank you.
Well, you guys are the professionals...
but is it usual that there is a single perpetrator for this kind of jewelry heist?
No. At least two, sometimes maybe three or four.
Then there's the timing of the robbery.
Weren't those diamonds supposed to be picked up?
- Yeah, 10:15, right when they opened. - Gee, you think maybe it's an inside job?
- Yes, I do. - Guess what, we're way ahead of you.
We're doing background checks on the whole staff.
My provisional bet? Provisional? Carl Ward.
Hello, he was shot three times.
The best accomplice is a dead one.
- He's not dead. - Nobody's perfect.
That's it? Carl Ward is crooked because he got shot?
- He's an ex tennis pro. - So?
Shady people. By definition, disappointed.
Should be on center court at Wimbledon. Instead he's tossing lobs to old ladies.
- Makes him bitter and twisted. - Case closed.
- I'm just saying. - Go talk to Murphy.
- See what he has to say about it. - Okay.
I'm just saying.
Jane knows about us. I'm sure he does.
Why would it be so bad if people figured out we're together?
Because.
What do you mean, "Why?"
I just mean, is this it?
- What, here? This building? - No, no. I mean us.
Is that all it's gonna be?
Sneaking around all the time? Afraid someone's gonna find out?
No, it's just the bureau rules. The rules are the rules, right?
- Maybe I'm sick of the rules. - There she blows.
- You don't wanna talk about it, huh? - No, I do. Just not here. Not on the job.
- We'll have to talk about it sometime. - Yeah, soon.
CBI.
We'd like to know about the resident who owns the blue beater there.
Murphy?
Pays his rent. Makes no trouble.
What did he do?
Has he had any visitors recently?
No. Oh, wait, yeah. Couple hours ago.
Big guy in a cowboy hat, pimped-out truck.
Stayed five minutes, split.
Does Murphy's room have any rear exit of any kind? A window?
Nope.
What did he do?
Mr. Murphy. State agents. We need to talk to you.
Mr. Murphy?
Go.
Clear.
Guess that lets Carl Ward off the hook then, huh?
Ballistics owes me. Expedited the report.
This gun was used to shoot both Doyle Murphy and Carl Ward.
There were no jewels in the room or the car. No prints on the gun.
Start going through Murphy's known associates.
We're looking for a cowboy and a fancy truck.
Thin trail. Murphy's a career criminal. He has a lot of associates.
Mm.
Maybe I can help.
Just maybe? Feeling unsure about yourself, are you?
Don't let one wrong hunch throw you.
Well, A, we don't know yet that I'm wrong about Ward.
And B, bring the motel desk clerk in.
Maybe he can recall a little more detail than he thinks about this cowboy.
- Can you see him? - Yes.
What's he doing?
He's getting out of the truck...
and he's walking across the forecourt to Murphy's room.
Can you read the license plate on the truck?
- No. - Look closer.
No, I can't. It's blocked.
What's he wearing?
Cowboy hat, brown.
Black jeans. Sunglasses, aviator style.
That's very good, Marty.
What else can you see?
He's wearing a T-shirt with a bulldog on the front.
Under it, "True Blue."
Donald Culpepper?
Who the hell are you?
Psst! Quiet.
We have reason to believe you visited Doyle Murphy...
at the Starlite Motor Court. Is that correct?
That's partially correct. I went to see him. He wasn't there.
- So I left. - Why'd you go see him?
Social visit. Catching up. He was married to my sister.
We have sad news. Your ex-brother-in-law is dead.
I'm in shock.
How'd that happen?
He was shot. Any idea who might wanna do that?
No.
- How about you? - I have nothing but love for Murph.
- Why would you think otherwise? - We read your rap sheet.
You're a professional criminal implicated in several murders.
I'm a dynamic businessman who pushes the envelope.
Anybody can imply anything. It's another thing to make it stick.
Yeah. Get out.
We need to continue this conversation downtown.
Thanks.
I deduce from the irritated tone of your conversation...
that I was right about Carl Ward.
Half right.
Go on.
His real name's Carl Wysocki. He was in jail for kiting checks.
He's got an ex-wife in Bayonne, New Jersey.
She's owed $90,000 in back alimony.
"Half"?
So he changed his name. What of it?
- Did you know about the jail time? - Yes, of course I did.
- And the ex-wife? - Of course. He told me everything.
Mm. Liar.
- Bad liar. - How dare you?
Well, it's a compliment to your good character.
You'd rather be a good liar? Hm?
I knew everything about Carl's past.
We're glad he told you, ma'am, because we have to consider the possibility...
that he was somehow involved in the jewel heist and double-crossed.
His honesty with you makes him far less of a suspect.
Do you have anything further? My husband needs me.
No, ma'am. Thank you.
How's he doing?
He'll live.
They're going to bring him out of sedation tomorrow.
Excellent.
Why did you visit with Doyle Murphy?
I didn't. He wasn't home.
If he had been home, what would you have said to him?
Give me my money.
He owed you. How much?
Two hundred grand and change.
He comes out of incarceration this last bit he did and needed to go into rehab.
Junkie son of a gun was there over a month, on my dime.
That's very generous of you.
Nah. What am I gonna do?
At the time, this was two years back, he's married to my sister. Moron.
Then he kicks your sister to the curb after domestic-violence problems.
He still owes you 200 grand.
One, my sister's a goblin shark. Freaking Gandhi would take a pop at her.
I got no beef with Doyle over that, believe me.
And two, this money is what I'm telling you.
Why would I kill a guy who owes me money?
- Because he just made a very big score. - Is that right?
Yes, it is. Maybe you decided to take what was owed you and a little bit more.
- What score is this? Doverton's? - You heard?
It was on the TV. Nice work.
Doyle did that? Wow.
Did you ever own a Beretta 950?
Matter of fact, I did used to have one of those.
I didn't like the balance.
I sold it to Doyle. Why?
Mm.
- Well... - I don't care what you're gonna say.
- I like him for it. - You don't care what I have to say?
He's obvious. You're gonna say he's not the guy because that would be boring.
No, he looks good for it. Superficially, at least.
I was merely gonna state that we need to find a link...
between him and Doyle and someone inside Doverton's.
I thought Carl Ward was your man.
No. I noted that he was a tennis pro and extrapolated from there.
No, you said he was the guy.
- Well, if you recall... - Guys. I mean, boss.
I think I found the link you're talking about.
The old footage from the cameras is saved on a hard drive offsite.
I figured if Murphy had been casing the store, I could find him on the footage.
- Who's that? - I'll enhance it.
Mm. Well...
Tom Doverton.
It's a customer, I guess. I'm talking to a customer.
That's the man who robbed your store and shot your uncle.
Are you sure you don't know him?
Because you're talking like you're old friends.
No. I'm just helping a customer with a purchase.
That's all.
And you've never seen that man before?
No.
And you don't know the name Doyle Murphy?
No.
The aunt and brother are here with a lawyer.
Darn. We haven't gotten anywhere with him yet.
You want me to stall them?
It's best just to cut him loose. He's denying everything anyway.
Unless we can make a connection to Culpepper or Doyle, we've got nothing.
Okay.
You go and ask Culpepper about Tom. I'll deal with the family.
You can take Tom home now.
We just had a couple questions we needed to ask him.
- What questions? - I'm sure he'll fill you in on the details.
Well, I'd appreciate it if next time you wish...
to speak to a member of my family, you call me first.
I'm sorry, ma'am, that's not our practice.
Can I walk you to the elevator?
You do know why I'm letting you go, don't you?
Let me guess. I'm innocent?
No, I figure just stupid.
- Is that so? - Yeah.
Either you really didn't know that Doyle was gonna actually rob the jewelry store...
Stupid innocent.
Or you did know, and you're gonna lead us to a clue.
Stupid guilty.
You should be more careful how you talk to people.
Eh. I figure I'm pretty safe here.
I mean, what are you gonna do?
You think I care where we are?
Go ahead. Do something, you miserable little sadist.
Hello, Lisbon. Hi, Dovertons.
- What's going on, Jane? - I'm just letting Mr. Culpepper go.
We don't need him for anything, do we?
- Do we? - Sometime, when you least expect it...
I'll find you.
- You, uh...? - We'll wait for the next one.
All right.
So long, partner. Happy trails.
- Okay, what the hell was that? - What was what?
Letting Donny Culpepper go.
You have no right to make those kind of decisions.
Well, you weren't gonna keep him here. On what? For what?
- He wasn't gonna talk. Be honest. - I could've held him...
- ... on the weapons charge. - Oh, please.
Stop. There's principle involved.
Don't think I don't know what you're doing.
- What are you talking about? - Showing the Dovertons to Culpepper.
You wanted to see if he recognized one of them.
You watch too much TV. There was no reason to keep Donny Culpepper.
That's just annoying. You're not even putting any effort into the lie.
Hey, boss. Coroner's here. She's got something to show us.
Wow. That's really beautiful.
I found it in Doyle Murphy's lower intestine.
My supposition is that he swallowed it in an attempt...
to get a larger share before it was divided with any partners.
Yeah, I guess Murphy misread that situation, huh?
You find anything else surprising in there?
Just that.
What the hell was that?
Uh... I, uh, ahem...
had a hunch that it was a fake.
Guess I'm wrong about that.
Uh, yeah.
- Where is it? - Well, the good news is...
it's not out there. So it's in here somewhere.
I'll find it.
Anyone see a little:
No?
There's gotta be a connection between Doyle Murphy and Tom Doverton.
What was it? What would bring those two together?
They have nothing in common.
- What are you guys looking for? - A diamond.
- What did he do? - Hit it with a fire extinguisher.
- Of course. - I got it.
Oh, thank God, where was it?
No, I got where Doyle and Tom connect. Doyle was in rehab.
Yes. And Tom Doverton does look the rehab type.
Van Pelt, find out where Doyle went to rehab. Keep looking.
Don't worry. This is the justice department.
- Who's gonna steal it here? - You be quiet.
I told him we were gonna come probably in about 10 minutes so...
Windward Clarity has the highest ratio of staff-to-patient...
of any facility in the state.
Our philosophy mixes traditional Western practices...
with spiritual aspects of the East.
Now, may I ask which one of you needs our help?
Or is it both of you?
- Actually, we just... - It's her.
- No. - Oh, darling, please.
Can we just this once do it my way? Just once.
Thank you.
In the beginning, it was just social, but...
Well, more recently...
it's been starting to worry both of us.
Right, darling?
Right this way. I'll introduce you to an intake specialist.
Fantastic.
Oop! Uh, that's the office. I'm gonna have to take this.
Baby, you go ahead, take a look. I'll be five minutes. I'll be right there.
Look after her.
I'm very proud of you.
- I understand your nervousness. - I love you.
It's completely natural.
But you've already taken the first step by recognizing there is a problem.
Our kitchen is capable of preparing food for any diet.
And, of course, we have a pair of on-site nutritionists.
Your husband is taking quite a long time.
You should understand, he's not really my husband.
Oh, that's quite all right. We're not judgmental about such things here.
That's not what I mean.
Whoa.
Uppers and downers. Uppers and... You're so rock 'n' roll, doctor.
That is private material. Doctor-patient privilege is sacrosanct.
Yes, I know, that's why we did it this way.
This is a murder investigation. We can be hard-assed.
I found it. The patient roster for the first two weeks of Doyle Murphy's stay.
Guess who his acting sponsor was when he first arrived?
- Tom Doverton? - No.
- George. - The brother?
- Yeah. - I will be calling your superiors.
A lot of people say that to me, and I say...
Let's go.
Come on.
Get some help, doc. That stuff will kill you.
George isn't here.
He's already left.
He's not guilty, you know.
- How did you know we were coming? - The director of the clinic called.
He told us what you'd done.
George was in rehab with Doyle Murphy, that's true, but that's all that it was.
So if we dig, we won't find any more contact...
between George and Doyle?
He came into the store.
A guy like that at Doverton & Company? I mean, come on.
- If my aunt found out... - We need to talk to George.
- He's gone. - Oh, really?
Uh, I think he's hiding behind the door.
George.
George, come out.
I'm sorry, Tom.
You were just trying to help.
But we both know there's no hiding from something like this.
I had nothing to do with the robbery or Doyle Murphy's murder.
I only lied to protect my aunt from the shame of my addiction.
Tom, call Dicky Purcell. Tell him to meet me at the CBI offices.
After you.
- Excuse me, do you work here? - Certainly, sir.
- How can I help you? - My wife, it's her birthday.
Of course. Of course.
Michelle. Michelle here would be happy to help you.
Thank you.
Mr. Doverton?
- Yeah. - I need a signature for this.
There you go.
What?
"You'll get a call in two hours.
Take the jewels where you are told.
No cops, or your aunt dies."
She's gone.
Oh, God.
Why would anybody kidnap Aunt Esther?
Someone thinks your brother was partners with Doyle Murphy.
- You think so. Why shouldn't everyone? - Donny Culpepper?
What? Who's Donny Culpepper?
You saw him when we were waiting.
Doyle Murphy owed him a lot of money. He might think that debt transfers...
- ... with the diamonds. - We don't have the diamonds.
- He doesn't know that. - You have to go arrest him. Right away.
That's what we're trying to do, Mr. Doverton.
Agent Van Pelt is working with police as we speak.
We're pursuing several leads.
But the note says no police.
Oh, it's a little late for that.
What are you gonna do?
- How are you gonna get our aunt back? - We'll do everything we can to find her.
In the meantime, when the kidnappers call, you have to try and stall them.
Take that. Okay.
- It's almost time. You ready? - Yeah. Ready.
And you?
I don't know.
Just stay calm.
Keep the kidnapper on the line and keep him calm.
Remember, keep it going as long as you can, okay?
- Headphones? - Yeah. Other room.
Ready?
Here we go.
Hello?
Do you have the jewels ready?
Your aunt.
How do I know you have my aunt?
- I demand to... - No.
You don't demand anything. You shut up and you listen.
I'm sorry.
- I'm sorry. I just need proof before... - Proof?
I'll give you proof.
Hello? George?
- Esther. Are you all right? - There, that's your proof.
Now, if you want to see her alive again, you're gonna bring me the diamonds.
I...
- I can't do that. I... - Got it.
You think this is some kind of a game?
No. I... I'm sorry.
Are you gonna give me the jewels?
I don't have the jewels. I'm trying to tell you.
All right, then.
This is your decision.
Aunt Esther.
You're next.
Now I'm coming for you.
Oh, my God.
Stay right there.
Rigsby.
Hello?
Where are the jewels, Tom?
We both know you have them.
They're going to catch you.
They're going to get you right now.
No, no, no. I'm gonna get you, Tom.
I know everything about you.
Yeah, Doyle Murphy told me everything.
Screw you.
I'll give you $50,000.
Fifty grand to leave me and my brother alone.
Oh, you think you're so tough.
You give me what I want, or I will come and take it from you.
I'll make it 75, but no more.
I'm not giving up the diamonds.
You stupid rich brat.
You think you can dictate terms?
Not this time, Tom.
Not this time.
- I'm gonna make you pay and pay. - You try it.
You try it, and you see what happens.
Tough guy, huh?
You're gonna give me the same thing you gave Doyle?
That's right.
You push me hard enough, you'll see.
Okay, thanks, Tom. That's great.
We got it all on tape. You're going down. Give me the phone.
Hands behind your back.
You're under arrest for the murder of Doyle Murphy.
Let's go.
Like a charm.
Ah. Tea.
Lovely.
Miss Doverton.
I'm sorry, but we've had to mislead you a little to solve this crime.
I'm afraid I've got some difficult news.
Your nephew Tom was involved in the robbery.
Tom?
Oh. Hey, Carl. Welcome back.
- Where am I? - In the hospital.
You just came out of an induced coma.
- Can I ask you a question? - What happened to me?
- Who are you? - Never mind that.
Tell me. Esther Doverton...
It was all a scam, right?
You just wanted to cash in with a rich old broad?
- Excuse me? - Oh, come on.
You don't need to be coy with me.
It was a great score. Plus, she's pretty good-looking...
which is an added bonus with these kind of scams.
Are you talking about my wife?
Who the hell do you think you are?
Wouldn't that be a better question for me to ask you, Mr. Wysocki?
- So that's it. - It had to end sometime.
You had a pretty good run. You know, between you and me...
I think you could squeeze more nickel out of this old bat.
- What do you think? - Don't you talk about her like that.
That woman is the only good thing that's ever happened to me.
I love her.
- You sure about that? - Shut up and get...
- Okay. Got you. - You son of a...
Told you he loves you.
Stop it. What are you trying to do, kill yourself?
I'm so sorry. I never meant to hurt you.
Got it.
Ah.
A long time ago that might have been a frog or a fern or a dinosaur.
- Then it died, turned into coal... - Yeah, I know.
I did first-grade geology too.
Well, I'm just saying, it's just compressed carbon to me.
If you want to keep it, I never saw a thing.
What? Get out of here. I wasn't even thinking about that.
Well, if you say so.
Seriously, you'd let me just walk out of here with this?
- Do you want to? - No. Of course not.
- I mean, yes, I'm tempted... - Okay, then. Put it in your pocket.
- This is a trap, isn't it? - Are you nuts?
- What do I care about your integrity? - Oh, yup. Trap.
- Okay. - Ha.
- Oh, Grace. - Hey.
Rigsby put something in your pocket.
What?
Wow.
He's messing with you.
It's compressed carbon.
If you want to keep it, I don't know about Rigsby...
but I wouldn't tell a soul.