Shaun, you need to make a decision.
Shaun, please. Your mom's been calling.
Your father wants to talk to you.
Say something, will you? Say anything.
I know he wasn't a good father,
but he's the only father you've got.
If ever there was something you wanted to say to him,
now's the time.
I have nothing to say to him.
Okay.
But if he wants to say something to me before he dies,
I'll listen.
Okay.
- Can you come with me? - Yeah, of course.
Can I bring a friend?
I don't think that's a good idea.
I want to bring a friend.
Shaun, how... how long have you been dating Carly?
I don't want to bring Carly.
I want to bring Lea.
Morning.
Never seen you here before.
Yeah, I just joined.
I'm not really a gym person,
but I, uh, thought I'd try something new.
It's a great way to clear your head.
Yeah. Um...
About last night.
In the stairwell.
Thanks.
No problem.
I know the boss isn't always the person you want to talk to,
but... if you ever do...
Thanks again.
But I'm fine. Really.
Is that guy serious?
That's it. That's it.
I'm gonna say yes, since that's Art Kalman.
Raiders' offensive tackle.
That's like 800 pounds.
It's the NFL.
No pain, no paycheck.
Come on! Awesome, man. We got you.
One more.
Naw, man. Come on, you're good.
One... more!
Push, push, push!
Push!
Aah!
Are you okay?
- Can you hear me? - Don't move.
I'm a doctor.
Where's it hurt?
It doesn't, but... I can't move.
Call 911.
I can't feel my legs!
Listen to me, Art.
You need to hold still.
I'm gonna take good care of you.
I can't feel my legs!
Synced & corrected by -robtor- www.addic7ed.com
You know, you don't have to go if you don't want to.
I can handle it.
I don't want to go.
I obviously have no wisdom to offer...
my own family's a disaster.
And things are crazy-busy at work now.
Okay.
But he's my best friend,
and he seems to need my support,
so there's no way I'm gonna say no.
Well, don't force yourself to go if you don't want to.
Sounds like you don't want me to go.
It's just that it's...
it's gonna be intense, it's gonna be emotional.
Really?
I thought going home to visit the parents
who abused and abandoned him would be a fun family reunion.
Why are you getting defensive?
Why do you have to be controlling?
- How am I controlling? - Hmm.
I'm just ask... I'm ready to go.
We have to be at the airport 90 minutes prior to our flight.
Can you believe the size of this guy?
Exactly why I don't watch football.
Size is more important than talent or skill.
I'm gonna guess you never played.
Half the players are morbidly obese.
Yet they can still run 4.9 forties and have 36-inch verticals.
It doesn't matter what kind of body you're born with.
No one makes it to the top
unless they're incredibly talented
and they worked their ass off.
It's just stupid.
Jocks get paid millions and get treated like royalty,
whereas people who do jobs that actually matter...
teachers, cops, doctors...
we can barely pay our student loans.
Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed.
I'm gonna guess someone else's.
I'm not doing that anymore.
Just like that?
Just like that.
This is bad.
Burst and facet fractures... T3 and 4.
Retropulsion of bony fragments in the spinal canal.
But look here.
There's no transectional bruising in his spinal cord.
We're in boarding group A, right?
Boarding group A,
no emergency exit row,
right side of the plane.
Have you spoken to Carly?
Not since last night.
Well, don't you think you should call her,
let her know where you're going and why and with whom?
She won't worry.
She knows I don't like my dad,
so I won't be sad when he dies.
Shaun...
call her and let her know
that you're... you're gonna miss her.
She must know I'll miss her.
Tell her anyway.
You know it must be good advice
if he and I actually agree.
If we can stabilize the fractures
and decompress the cord,
we should be able to reverse the paralysis.
Fantastic. We should start a preoperative Riluzole regimen.
No.
There's an experimental hypothermia treatment
shown to reduce cord edema and cell death
when done prior to surgery.
It's also shown a high rate of bradycardia and arrhythmias,
which is the last thing I want to deal with during surgery.
There's an infusion protocol we can follow
to reduce that risk.
The faster we reduce the inflammation...
Thank you, I appreciate your input,
but as Art's surgeon...
She's right.
And what makes you think you're doing the surgery?
Dr. Melendez, I appreciate all you've done.
But now that he's stable, my staff will take over.
Well, actually, that's not your call.
Or mine.
You're a pro athlete with a pro athlete's body.
And you need a surgeon who understands
that this is not just about making sure you can walk again.
It's about making sure you can run, block,
so you can get back out on that field
and play at the top of your game.
This is what I do.
Sure, you do knees, you do shoulders.
Have you ever done anything like this before?
Robert Stokes, last year.
Donny Lund a few years before that.
Both players had similar spinal fractures.
Actually, not that similar.
This is more like what I see in high-speed motorcycle accidents.
And unfortunately, I've seen a lot of those.
Not one or two every few years, but 20 to 30 every year.
That's what do.
This is gonna be awesome.
Have you got something to say?
I get you want to deal with stuff on your own,
for people to mind their own business.
But whatever pressure you've been feeling is still here.
If you don't seek help or rely on other people,
you will fail.
Thank you.
Should we get back to work now?
Ladies and gentlemen,
welcome to Cheyenne Regional Airport.
I changed my mind.
I don't want to hear what he has to say.
I think you do want to hear what he has to say.
No. No.
- Okay... - I-I don't want to be here.
- Shaun... - Okay, why don't we just sit
in the car for a while?
There's no rush.
Okay.
I want to go.
Now.
- Shaun, take a deep breath. - No, thank you.
I don't want to take a breath.
- Shaun, just... - No, I want to go!
- I want to go. - Okay.
- I want to go now! - Okay.
- Go now! Please! - Okay, okay, okay. Okay. Okay.
- Okay. Okay. - Please.
Here we go.
- Please, okay, go now. - We're going back to the hotel.
- I'm sorry. - Go now!
- We'll settle in at the hotel... - Go now!
We're going. It's gonna be okay.
- We're going. - Go now, please!
We'll settle in at the hotel, and then we'll see, okay?
Okay.
How you doing?
I'm ready to go home.
We're not gonna be able to do that until tomorrow,
so...
maybe we should try to make the most of our visit.
Shaun, it's okay.
Just because your dad's dying
doesn't mean he deserves to be forgiven.
And if he dies
before you're ready to listen
to whatever he wants to say,
that's his fault.
His.
Not yours.
There is someone I'd like to see.
He's in a peaceful place.
He's decomposed.
Except for maybe his face and hands.
That's where they concentrate the embalming fluid
because that's what people see at the funeral.
Are you ready?
Okay.
Well, you take as much time as you need.
Your Mom and I are gonna wait in the car.
I'm not going with you.
Shaun...
I'm never going with you.
What are you gonna do? Hmm?
You gonna live in that bus?
You gonna eat out of the trash?
Huh?
Come on, let's go home. Leave me alone.
It was an accident, Shaun.
A horrible, tragic accident.
And I know you're hurting.
I promise you, he's hurting, too.
You don't get over losing a child.
He wants to see you.
What do you want to do?
But you don't have to.
If you're not ready yet, that's fine.
Whatever feels right for you, that's what you should do.
Hi, Shaun.
Hello.
Can I hug you?
No.
Got venous blood return.
I'm in the subclavian.
- Next step? - Large bore catheter.
FYI, he grew up poor.
He bought his mom a house with his signing bonus.
Set up a business for his brother and cousins...
Focus on the procedure.
You can write his biography on your own time.
Infusing 400 milliliters cooling saline.
Core body temp down to 94.5.
He's bradycardic.
Push.5 atropine.
Let's get a transcutaneous pacer on him.
Low charge.
We can't allow the contractions to increase the dislocation
and sever the cord.
Charge at 40.
40 milliamps.
Clear.
Can't feel his pulse.
10 milliliters epi on a long needle.
We should start compressions.
No, we can't risk further dislocation.
- Should we up the... - No. Keep it at 40.
40 milliamps.
Clear.
No response. Give him more atropine.
Should we push more IV epi?
No, that'll take too long.
We should increase the charge by 100.
No, we can't take that risk.
Better paralyzed than dead.
He's got a pulse.
Core temp?
93.2.
That's cool enough.
Let's monitor him closely overnight,
make sure that his BP and heart rate are steady
before we start surgery.
Shaun, I'm sorry.
It's just... I always wanted a son.
I mean, a boy that I could teach to hunt and fish.
Play catch with.
Have a beer with.
A little kid that I could carry around on my shoulders.
And I got angry.
Not at you, but just me.
I was pissed off at myself.
Because I couldn't help my son.
No matter how hard I tried, I always failed.
But you were a good kid.
And you've become a great man.
Better than I could ever dream of.
I'm proud of you, Shaun.
And I love you.
I just wanted you to know that.
You...
are not a good person.
You always drank too much beer,
which made you stink.
- Shaun. - Mm.
And you always blame other people.
And you hit and punch other people...
Shaun, please calm down.
You killed my rabbit.
Shaun...
You killed my rabbit.
And you killed my brother!
S-So I don't care that you're dying!
I don't care at all!
Shaun.
You done yet? We need to follow up on Art.
I'll be right there.
You said that 10 minutes ago.
I am just finishing up some charts.
The charts on your phone?
Satisfied?
Nice. Very dramatic. And stupid.
People need to be able to page you.
Tequila, stat.
♪ Love ♪ - No, thank you.
♪ Is a winner's game ♪
♪ No one to thank ♪
We need to do something fun.
Like go for a swim.
There is a gorgeous lake a few blocks away.
I saw it when we first drove in.
It's the Rocky Mountains. It's December.
So? My family used to do
a New Year's Eve "Polar Bear Plunge"
at our lake house.
Sometimes, my dad would...
The diagnosis is correct.
♪ ... is just a cause for sinning ♪
There is no hope. He's going to die.
♪ Some see the beginning ♪
Yeah.
♪ We'd find our way through the joy and the pain of love ♪
Shaun, I don't think you're done with your dad.
You can't help him medically, but you can talk to him.
Yes, you have every right to be angry,
but I'm not so sure that's all you feel.
I think we should go home to the motel,
get some sleep, wake up in the morning,
go to the Hilltop, get some pancakes,
and then see what happens.
♪ ... is a poor man's drink ♪
Sounds like a very wise plan.
Good.
On the other hand, there is that lake.
- Oh, my God, do you ever stop? - No.
I'm going with Lea.
- Yes! - The lake is probably half frozen.
I'm going with Lea.
Let's do this, Shaunie.
♪ Hate ♪
♪ Is a poor man's drink ♪
♪ And some say death is just our cause for sinning ♪
Your heart is stabilized,
and surgery will likely be in a few hours.
You're gonna walk out of here and probably even play again.
You want to know why I chose you guys?
Because I thought you didn't care if I played or not.
I hate football.
I always have.
But you've dedicated your entire life
to being the best at it.
I was 6'1", 250 pounds in 8th grade.
When I got to high school, the coach,
he didn't ask me to play... he told me.
But from the first practice, it was...
It's not who I am.
I wanted to quit, but...
college coaches started calling my mom.
She insisted it was God's plan.
Why else would I be born this way?
But you're not a kid anymore.
You must have plenty of money.
Everybody depend on me...
my mother, my brother,
my cousins, my friends.
They'd hate me.
So I prayed to get hurt,
but no matter how out of control I played...
I thought I'd go to the weight room
and blow out a knee, and then this happens.
He wants closure. There's no such thing.
Some relationships are just not meant to be,
which is why people should focus
on nurturing the ones they have,
instead of trying to salvage the ones they've lost.
Talking's done.
Time for action.
Okay.
What's wrong?
The majority of drownings are caused
by swimming after drinking alcohol.
Not gonna be a problem, because we're not gonna swim.
It's way too cold for that.
We're just gonna run in
until it's deep enough to dunk our heads
and then run back out.
- No. - Oh, come on.
It'll feel amazing.
Like... Like you've just had an awesome massage.
I don't like massages.
It's not at all like a massage.
It's... It's not even close to that.
I don't like the mud.
It gets between my toes.
You won't even feel it.
Your toes will be numb as soon as they hit the water.
But that feeling when you get out...
that warm, tingly sensation...
it's the best high there is.
That can't be true.
Okay.
Guess I'll just have to go solo, then.
You're not supposed to swim alone.
I'm not alone. You're here.
And you're gonna regret it if you don't come with me.
Suit yourself.
Aah!
Lea?
Lea!
Damn it!
If only I could hold my breath longer than 15 seconds!
That is not a good joke!
I knew you would forgive me.
Shaun's not an angry person.
Right?
He can be insecure, maybe.
Uh, stubborn sometimes.
But he's not an angry person.
And if that's the last conversation
he has with his dad, then...
then all I've succeeded in doing
is ripping open an old scab,
and this whole trip was a mistake.
His dad was a disaster,
and his mom did nothing to protect him.
So, I just don't think you need to be so worried
about getting him to forgive.
You're gonna become a-a parent someday.
Maybe. Right?
I...
Well, if you do,
you're gonna be responsible for another human being.
And your first job, number one,
is to keep them alive.
You're gonna make mistakes,
but you hope that one mistake doesn't scar you for life.
Uh, I'm...
I'm sorry.
Shaun's dad needed a little bit of mercy.
We'll leave in the morning.
I don't like the mud.
It gets between my toes.
Aw, come on, buddy. We can't turn back now.
We're almost to the waterfall.
I can wait here.
Um, I-I'll meet you when you come back.
No, no, no, no, you're too young to be left alone.
I tell you what... I will help you
clean every speck of dirt off your feet as soon as we cross.
I don't want to.
Okay, well, what if I carry you?
You won't even touch the water.
- No, I don't want to be picked up. - It'll be five seconds.
For the most amazing mountaintop picnic ever!
And I-I got all your favorite foods.
I got, uh, peanut butter and jelly on white bread,
I got apples, chocolate chip cookies.
Huh?
Aw, Shaun, come on.
- No! No, put me down! - All right, all right, all right, all right.
No, no, no, buddy, it's okay, it's okay.
- It's okay! - Let me go! Put me down!
- Okay. Okay. - Let me go!
All right, all right. All right.
You did good.
You're okay. We're good. It's all good.
All right, let's do this.
Put your shoes on, bud.
These are as good as I remember.
There's a flight at 11:00,
if that's what you want.
Are you good with that?
Shaun?
You never could get enough of Hilltop's pancakes.
Can we talk?
It'll just take a minute. I promise.
Okay.
♪ When I kiss her heated lips... ♪
Inflammation's definitely been reduced.
- Well done, Doctor. - Thanks.
And get the rods and place set screws...
- Got it. - ... while Park and I compress the spine
above and below the fracture to improve alignment.
All I ever wanted was to figure out a way
to move past... everything.
I wanted us to be a family again.
Why did you stay with him?
I don't know.
I just...
I love him.
You loved him more than me and Steve?
No.
That isn't true.
I just...
I guess I knew what I could do for him.
With you...
I don't blame you for hating us.
We were young.
Stupid.
Not like people today.
Like Dr. Glassman.
There was so much we didn't understand about...
you.
And what you needed from us.
We've missed you.
So much.
Can I hug you?
♪ That the one who loves you is waiting ♪
♪ That the one who loves you is waiting here at home ♪
I need to talk to my dad.
I thought you went home.
I couldn't let you put me on your shoulders.
Or let you hug me.
I couldn't make you happy.
You are my son.
You're Shaun.
I forgive you.
And...
I don't want to punish you anymore.
I don't want to punish you.
You're not like other people.
You're s-so smart.
But weak.
You're like a spoiled, little baby.
He's delirious from the morphine.
You understand. He... He doesn't know what he's saying.
You're damn right Stevie's death wasn't my fault.
- It was yours. - Shh, shh, shh.
He was always trying to impress you.
- You and that damn rabbit. - Ethan, shh!
- Shaun, let's go. - Stop. Shh.
Oh, yeah, go ahead.
Get out of here.
- Run away again! - Come on.
G-G-Go ahead! Run away again!
Shh, shh, shh, shh.
Now what?
You need to tell them.
If they care about you, they will understand.
No one will blame you for retiring
after breaking your back.
Nearly paralyzing yourself.
My mom worked minimum-wage jobs her whole life.
Raised an entire family on her own.
And you think I should tell her I want to quit the NFL
because I don't "like" it?
Because it's not "fun" for me?
You think I don't understand what it's like
to need to please your mother.
No matter how hard you work,
you still owe something more.
And every good thing that has ever happened to you
is pure luck.
But every bad decision you make,
that's the real you.
And you deserve to suffer.
Your mom called.
Your dad passed 30 minutes ago.
You want to stay for the funeral?
No.
I want to go home.
Okay.
You want me to stay for a while?
Talk?
No.
Well, we don't have to talk. We can just sit.
Or, um, go for a walk.
I'm... tired.
I should go to sleep.
Okay.
Good night.
Hey, it's Claire.
Yeah, I know. I, um...
I got a new phone with a different number.
I changed my mind.
I think we should meet up... tonight.
Ma?
Yes, baby.
I'm here.
There's something I need to tell you.
I'm sorry for making you meet me after hours like this.
I just...
I really needed someone to talk to.
Of course, Claire.
I'm always available for my patients.
- Come on in. - Thanks.
Shaun?