- Mm! - To us.
We sold two condos in Coral Gables in one day.
Well, you did all the work, though.
You managed the hell out of those listings.
Good management is second nature to me.
Like, if I were managing this bar,
I'd put up a football banner, get some men in here.
It's all ladies.
Yeah, by choice.
See? That's why you're a bad manager, Deb.
You're ignoring 50% of the population.
How are these women gonna meet anyone?
[DOOR OPENS]
Unh-unh-unh. No minors allowed.
NICOLE: Uh, sorry. I was just...
Nicole?
What are you doing here?
Honey, Mrs. Huang!
I, uh...
I just love alcohol.
Honey, I saw a Lifetime movie about this.
You've got to put her in rehab
before she stabs you and your husband
to get the key to the liquor cabinet!
Okay, I didn't come here to drink.
I heard the Denim Turtle has a softball team
and I wanted to sign up.
How do you even know about this place?
[EXHALES DEEPLY]
I need to talk to you.
[GLASS CLINKS, WOMEN MURMURING]
Kristen, get that bottle of champagne.
Barb, get that cot ready in the back.
We've got to be prepared for this to go either way.
Bev, you set?
It's either gonna be B4 or C29.
Um, I've been wanting to tell you this for a while,
but I could never find the right time.
But maybe there's never a right time.
So...
I'm gay.
Oh, Nicole. Come here.
[APPLAUSE]
C29, baby!
♪ Come to my window ♪
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
♪ Crawl inside, wait by the light of the moon ♪
What do you mean you're gay? You're not a man.
She's not a man.
♪ I'll be home soon ♪
You mean it can go the girl way?
♪ Keeping my eyes... ♪
S04E06 A League of Her Own
♪ Fresh off the boat ♪
♪ I'm gettin' mine everywhere I go ♪
♪ If you don't know, homey, now you know ♪
♪ Fresh off the boat ♪
♪ Homey, you don't know where I come from ♪
♪ But I know where I'm goin' ♪
♪ I'm fresh off the boat ♪
sync and corrected by ninh www.addic7ed.com
So far, I've only told Eddie.
I sent a letter to Jodie Foster, but I haven't heard back.
Well, I'm glad you told me.
You know I'll always support you.
How about Patrick Swayze in "Dirty Dancing"?
Again, I'm not attracted to any men.
Wow.
Have you thought about telling your dad?
Oh, I've tried to tell him.
A few times.
Dad, there's something I have to tell you.
Hmm?
I...
I want a bass guitar.
I...
need a new tent.
I'm a Wiccan.
My dad thinks I'm a musical witch who loves to camp.
Oh, so that's why he keeps
giving you all those Stevie Nicks CDs.
I do want to tell him, though.
I just have to find the right time.
You'll know when it's right.
What's the big deal? Just tell him.
It's not that simple.
This is Marvin we're talking about, right?
I'll tell him. Hey, Deb, give me the phone.
I'll call him. I'll tell him right now.
Wait, no. Jessica, that's the worst thing anyone can do.
Nicole has to come out to Marvin when she's ready.
Thanks.
Honestly, I'm just happy telling you went well.
I feel like I can relax and focus on softball.
Team Cattleman's!
The Greater Orlando Bar and Restaurant
Softball Tournament is here!
Play ball!
♪ Y'all ready for this? ♪
Evan, Emery, and Hector
are wearing our brand-new
1997 Cattleman's Ranch
softball team uniforms,
featuring three kinds of Lycra
and extra-long jerseys!
Emery, why don't you tell us
who we're playing
in the first round?
We're playing...
the Denim Turtle.
Those broads have never lost a game.
We're screwed!
Hey, win or lose,
we'll definitely have the most team spirit.
Am I right?
[CHUCKLES]
Uh, Louis? Can I talk to you for a second?
Oh, sure.
Evan, take over.
Make sure everyone gets a spirit stick, okay?
[SIGHS] God, I love this team.
I feel like Joe Torre but with better hair.
So, I've run the numbers,
and you've spent more on softball uniforms and equipment
than we've spent on vinaigrette for the whole year.
Sure, but vinaigrette isn't gonna bring a staff together.
You can't put a price on bonding.
You can, actually. It's $2,500. And it's too much.
I'm here to represent the interests of Kenny Rogers,
and all restaurant decisions are supposed to be 50/50.
I can't support this.
But the staff loves the team!
Maybe if you ever won
and got the restaurant's name out there,
we could justify it.
But you lose every game every year.
What about this...
If we win the tournament, we get to keep the team?
How about this... if you win one game, just one,
a game, you... You can keep the team.
I find your lack of confidence annoying,
but I accept your terms.
You came out to my mom?
Jessica? Jessica Huang?
It really blew her mind.
She kept asking me, "You feel nothing for Denzel?"
Again, I-I'm not attracted to any men.
Not even Denzel, though? When he's in a suit?
Okay, your turn. What's your Saturn news?
Isn't it dope?
It's my fashion manifesto.
Look at the number. Double zero.
Like butt cheeks.
[CHUCKLES]
Great news! Marvin got us a ringer!
Why? We already have a doorbell we like.
Sharp, strong "ding" followed by elegant, low "dong."
EMERY: No. A ringer's a very skilled player
who's brought in to make sure the team wins.
- Oh. - Turns out, Bobby Bonilla,
the Florida Marlins third baseman,
is a close friend and client of Marvin,
who convinced him to play for Cattleman's!
Ho ho, this changes things! [PEN CLICKS]
I'm gonna need a few more minutes with the lineup.
I have to do things differently this year
if Cattleman's is gonna win.
I need to change it up, develop more of a killer instinct...
I'll stop you right there.
I don't have time
to manage your softball team to its first victory.
That's not what I meant.
I'm the manager of the Cattleman's team.
Are you saying I can't manage your team to victory?
I haven't mentioned you at all.
Managing is managing.
You don't know anything about softball.
One person throws a big ball,
another person runs to the squares...
- Bases. - Whatever!
I don't care what you say.
I can manage any team to victory.
It doesn't even have to be yours.
Challenge accepted.
What just happened?
I need to speak with the manager of the softball team.
I'm the team manager.
I want to challenge you for control of the team.
This is an academic history of the game of softball
from 1887 to 1937.
I got it at the library,
along with the newest James Patterson.
I've read it cover to cover. Ask me anything.
[LAUGHS]
This is exactly how I took control of the team.
Remember that, Bev?
Oh, I remember.
[LAUGHS]
Time to hand this over.
She blows for you now.
Also, remember to bring orange slices for everyone.
I will be the best manager of a softball team
since Walter Hakanson coined the term "softball" in 1927.
Before that, it was called "mush ball."
Emery, when Bonilla gets to practice,
make sure you get a picture of our first handshake.
Two men, web-to-web.
Okay, ladies, let's practice.
You said I couldn't manage a team.
And now I'm managing the team that's gonna beat you.
I never said that.
You implied it.
I can't believe you would go this far to prove a point.
Can't you, though?
Well...
Uh, h-hey, what's my dad doing here?
You didn't say anything to him, did you?
No. I would never.
But maybe this is like when you saw me at the Denim Turtle.
Maybe this is a sign.
Yeah. Maybe it is.
Look who it is, huh?
You didn't tell me you were playing softball, Princess.
Yeah, I'm on the Denim Turtle team.
Look, Dad, I...
Oh, those Denim Turtle gals are great.
You just make sure that's the only team of theirs
you're playing on, huh?
[CHUCKLES]
So, what were you gonna tell me?
Just that, uh, the... the tent you got me
is too small for my bass guitar and witch stuff.
Well, we'll go to Big Five tomorrow.
Hustle! Let's go! Let's go!
It was just a joke. A really bad joke.
I'm sure he didn't mean it any more
than that one he tells about Mexican train killers
having "loco-motives."
Ha!
Oh, I just got that!
Loco-motives.
Honey, it's okay.
I'll just never tell my dad
and live my life in secret forever.
No big deal.
That's a very big deal.
A life in secret is no way to live.
Trust me, I know.
I didn't tell my parents I was dating Marvin for years.
Why?
Because he's white.
But you... You're white.
Yeah, and you know parents and their expectations.
Anyway, when I finally got the courage to tell them,
I was so relieved.
And they ended up loving Marvin.
Will you be there when I tell him, for moral support?
Of course.
And we can tell him at movie night,
so he'll be relaxed.
Watch "Crimson Tide."
Tell him after the part
when Denzel relieves Gene Hackman of his command.
Or maybe after watching that,
you won't have anything you need to tell him at all.
What do you mean Bonilla's not coming?
You said you two would do anything for each other.
Well, that's what I thought.
You know, I did that man's bridge work, Lou.
I had my hands in his mouth for 36 months.
Bonilla was my whole strategy!
Don't worry about it.
I got you another ringer.
Who?
Me!
You?
Oh-ho.
Dear God!
Yeah, I played mush ball
for three championship seasons in the Navy.
[CHEERING] Welcome to the team.
Okay, Cattleman's!
Line up for a sliding drill! Come on!
Come on, baby! Let's go!
Come on! Hustle! Hustle!
Nice. There we go. Come on.
Hustle, hustle. Get dirty!
There we go. Show me what you got.
Let them slide all they want. I'm keeping you clean.
You're in the wrong place if you want to stay clean.
I bought this yesterday.
[INSECTS CHIRPING]
I'm crazy nervous.
Don't be. I'm here to support you.
I have my boom box all ready.
MARVIN: Oh, I love movie night.
[GIGGLES]
All right.
What are we watching, ladies?
"A League of Their Own."
Penny Marshall don't make no junk.
[LAUGHS]
This is such a great movie.
Yeah.
Good to see women supporting other women.
Right, Nicole?
Right.
Yeah, that Tom Hanks isn't half bad, either.
Let me get us some more popcorn.
Yeah.
MAN: Play ball!
Whoa.
Dad, I need to talk to you.
Ooh. Pause button. Must be big.
Yeah, it is.
Um...
I, uh...
I talked to Mrs. Huang,
and I told her I prefer playing shortstop,
but she made me first base.
Well, that's good to know, Princess.
But it's hardly pause-worthy.
Come on. I'm in the middle of a narrative here.
♪ Come to my window ♪
I'm sorry. Sorry. I'm... I'm so sorry.
So, I wanted to keep my Bootyman jersey fresh for school,
but the dirt is red.
How am I supposed to keep it clean?
Dude. J-Just fake an injury, and then you'll get benched.
Huh. Guess that's pretty simple.
Sorry to call you into the Saturn.
Okay, we need to set some ground rules
about what's Saturn-worthy.
[SIGHS]
I chickened out and didn't tell my dad.
Oh, man, I'm sorry.
I think I'm scared because he sees me in a certain way.
But you're the same person you've always been.
I'm sure your dad will get that.
I just told Honey.
I don't need to tell my dad right now.
Okay, yeah, whatever feels right.
What's the status of this French fry on the floor mat?
You know what? Don't tell me.
This is it, boys.
My favorite part of managing a team... The Pep Talk.
This game was invented
by a bunch of drunk men at a boat club.
But for one afternoon,
we need to pretend like this game matters.
So, let's get out there like Chester Hatterton III.
And let's win this game.
Team Cattleman's!
You know how much pride I take
in the fact that we're number one in heart.
But today, we need to be number one on that field.
In terms of scoring.
Also number one in heart if possible.
But if we have to give up a little heart
in order to get in an extra run, do it.
Or else there will be no team next year.
Just wanted to wish you guys good luck,
let you know I take no joy in watching your inevitable defeat.
Chestnut, please.
This dugout is for players only. [GROANS]
Oh, no! I fell. I'm injured, and I twisted my ankle.
I guess I can't play.
What are we gonna do, Dad? We need nine people.
[GROANS]
Oh, that's too bad.
I guess you'll have to forfeit.
Suit up. You're playing.
- Hmm? - Eddie, give Mr. Chestnut your jersey.
What?
I-I can't play. My hamstrings are tight.
All of our hamstrings are tight.
I thought we were 50/50 partners.
You are a part of the Cattleman's family, aren't you?
Uh...
Any phone numbers you score in that come straight to me.
Okay, one more thing, ladies. One more thing.
Now, I know most coaches hand out orange slices.
Fortunately, I'm not most coaches.
I have a box of "winner pears" here.
I'm using them for positive reinforcement.
So, if one of you does something good, you just take a pear.
Go. Go earn your pear.
Hey, Jessica.
Nicole and I had a real good talk the other night...
At movie night. I know.
And she said that you weren't supportive of her preference.
I was supportive.
If Nicole wants to be gay, she should be gay.
What?
What did you say?
Uh...
What?
Nicole said she preferred to play shortstop
and you made her play first base.
Yes.
That's also what I was talking about.
Being a coach, you have to make hard decisions.
Nicole.
You're gay?
[MOUTHS] I'm sorry.
Uh...
[CHUCKLES] Yeah.
I-I am.
I-I-I tried to tell you.
But I-I just... I didn't know how.
LOUIS: Marvin, let's go!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
You outed Nicole?
It was an accident!
I thought you already told him.
You said you were gonna tell him on movie night.
I said we'd hang a pride flag outside the front door
if we were successful.
What's a pride flag?
[CLAPPING]
Great job, Nicole!
Way to play base!
Anyone who can't see how amazing you are,
they aren't worth your time!
- Aah! - You're out!
Damn it! I misjudged that!
I'm so sorry, Nicole. I didn't mean to tell Marvin.
I know. I just wish it could have happened differently.
Was it the best way to come out? No.
But, on the bright side,
at least now your dad knows, right?
I don't think he's taking it too well.
He's probably still processing.
- Whoo! - Let's go!
[APPLAUSE]
Oops.
He's being bad on purpose!
[INDISTINCT SHOUTING]
Oops.
- That's it! Time out! - Time!
We had a deal!
And whether or not you like this team,
the least you could do is try!
I am trying! I swear. [SNIFFLES]
It's just that I'm really, really bad at sports.
Are you... crying?
Back at Roasters,
all I ever wanted to do was be on the kickball team,
but Kenny cut me because I couldn't kick or throw.
Kenny can be ruthless.
I heard Johnny Cash wanted to grow a beard,
but Kenny wouldn't let him.
Maybe that's why I was so against this team.
I just thought it was another opportunity for me to get cut.
You know what? You're a part of the Cattleman's team now.
Oh, thanks, Louis.
I really appreciate that.
[SOBS]
Oh.
Ah-ah-ah! No tears on the jersey!
Cry clean, man.
Take back your whistle. I don't deserve it.
I screwed up the whole Nicole-Marvin thing.
I'm a terrible manager.
The woman who came into the bar and demanded this whistle,
she wouldn't give up.
Is it easy? No.
If it were, Bev would do it.
Uh, she had a late night last night.
The VH1 Awards were on,
and she wanted to see Jamiroquai close it out.
Anyway, look. Go over there and make it right.
And we will get out there and bring you back a "W."
"W" means win.
[WHISTLE BLOWS]
Take a pear and get out there, woman-gay.
Okay, let's go, Nicole!
HONEY: Whoo-hoo!
[CHEERING]
I got it! I got the ball! Louis!
Just throw it!
I can't. I know I can't throw it.
Roll it! Just roll it!
Go, go, go, go, go! Go, go, go!
Ohh!
Dad, what are you doing?
[LAUGHS]
I thought you were mad at me.
No. I was mad at myself.
I made that dumb joke
about not wanting you to play on their "team."
I didn't even really mean that.
It was just a pun, and it was sitting right there.
I could... I couldn't not say it.
But that pun in no way reflects my values
or my opinions about you.
I tried to tell you a bunch of times.
I was just worried you'd see me differently.
Aww. You'll always be my Princess.
You're out.
Thanks, Dad.
No, I mean it. You're out.
I got the ball.
- You're out! - [LAUGHS]
Huh?
What was that?
Congratulations on your win.
Congratulations on your 1.
Sorry I had to beat you. I know I get competitive.
Ah, it's okay.
For me, this is really just about bringing people together.
You know, for the first time in a long time,
I agree with you.
Hey, uh, Louis, I-I just wanted to say
in front of the whole team... that you were right.
This team is important.
I mean, vinaigrette, it's delicious,
but it doesn't bond people like this.
The Cattleman's team stays!
[CHEERING]
Thank you, Matthew.
- Oh, you're welcome. - Hey, I got to tell you, though,
that was a sweet roll you made out there.
Oh, you don't have to...
Ohh!
- Aah! - Whoo!
R.I.P., Bootyman.
You were too beautiful for this world.
My dad's been great. You know,
he's of a different generation, so he talks around things.
Rock Hudson comes up a lot.
Who's that?
I think some guy he was in the Navy with?
Honestly, he's just so relieved I'm not a Wiccan.
Can I get your bass guitar?
I got some riffs I need to lay down.
[KNOCK ON WINDOW]
Great news, Nicole!
I got us hockey tickets for Saturday night!
Hey, is that your girlfriend?
Yo!
Uh, Dad, this is Eddie.
Eddie? [CHUCKLING] I'm sorry.
The light hit the window at an angle.
I couldn't see you.
All I saw was a lot of smooth skin.
sync and corrected by ninh www.addic7ed.com